Now that I've established that I'm crazy, I also want to mention something else about me buying roses at the grocery tonight.
I don't know what it is about muzac. Ordinarily, I am sort of a bad listener. This really means I'm super visual. I take in things by my eyeballs, and that is how I listen. And what that really means is I get in trouble a lot for being such a poor listener. But would someone please tell me why, when I'm wandering in a grocery and all I hear are soft rock hits from the seventies and eighties*, my listening skills are fine-tuned to, dare I say, perfection?
Tonight, at the grocery, the soundtrack for me picking out roses was Billy Joel's 1989 smash hit "We Didn't Start the Fire." Free of charge. I was struggling to make sure I heard "cola wars I can't take it anymore" and "JFK whatelse do I have to say" before I paid and left. Just hearing those lines - er, listening to them - gave me the sickest form of satisfaction that I should hope you never have to experience. What's wrong with me?! What would have happened if a store employee cut into "JFK..." with a seafood department special? I can't even imagine the damage, folks. My concentration was completely focused on Billy. Completely. Even when that insanely melodramatic guitar riff/percussion nightmare cuts right to the climax of the song, I was listening (like a hawk?). And loving it. Tell me more, Billy, tell me more.
Does this suggest that if everyone rock-rapped their dialogues to me, I'd listen any better? What if they said to me during every pause, "it was always burning since the worlds been turning we didn't start the fire we've been trying to fight it but something about light it?" Hmm, would I listen to that? Don't think so. But I would at least tap my feet more than I do now, that's for fuckin' sure.
Look out! Billy Joel is driving! Driving Madge crazier, that is.
*I don't necessarily think 'We Didn't Start the Fire' is soft rock, but I just love to say soft rock hits from the seventies and eighties, regardless of the real genre. Crap from the late '80s might do just as well.
4 comments:
That was the best song,
That IS the best song...
Wheel of Fortune, Sally Ride!
Okay, I so hear you.
When I'm at the store and I hear "When Doves Cry", I'm pissed off that Prince would let a satellite play his music in a grocery store in white suburbia to a whole bunch of people who can't steer carts.
But then, I start to sing along, because it's Prince, and I found my cereal.
And THEN, right at the part when he sings, "This is what it sounds like...when(BLEEP!! "Thanks for shopping Publix! We're having a special on all canned goods. Buy nine get eight free! Thanks again and see you at the front!")
..."Maybe I'm just like my father..."
OH, THE HUMANITY!
One time 'Raspberry Beret' was playing when I walked in through the out door (out door).
This is a true story. I swear!!!
my favorite song in supermarkets is "september." "like a prayer" is currently being played in safeways nationwide.
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