gnarly
I am in the midst of a long, long weekend that technically began Wednesday night.
On that very night, I drove down to W. Palm Beach to kick off camping season with my boyfriend. We are very "close your eyes - point to a place on the Florida state map - now! That is where we'll camp this weekend" about camping. We love to camp. Here then is a photo of our last camping trip to Alafia River State Park (in March 2005). We probably won't go back there, only because of the lack of trees around the campsites:
However, as soon as I made my way into W. Palm Beach city limits, my boyfriend informed me that he had gout in his right foot: "Don't laugh! This isn't a joke!"
When someone tells you they have gout, and you think you might be going camping, think again.
You are not going camping for the weekend.
"It sounds like I have scurvy or gangrene."
Yes babe, that's what I was thinking exactly.
Gout is probably the gnarliest name EVER for a case of extremely crippling arthritis (something has crystalized around a joint in his right foot, er, I think something like that). But, it is what it is. It doesn't help that my boyfriend was given medication that says "take every two hours until diarrhea occurs."
Now we're on to that part.
In a very Johnny Cash tribute kind of way, we've dubbed his asshole the Ring of Fire.
He's finally sleeping now.
I feel so bad for him.
9 comments:
HAHAHAHA! i'm sorry, not laughing at the gout. those directioons were hilarious.
"until diarrhea occurs"?!
btw - i learned that punctuation goes after the quote marks if it's not included in the quote. riveting? oh yes.
that's so crummy though about the camping. and the goat. i mean, gout. oops.
that just means you get to go camping later when it's nice & chilly and you can snuggle up in front of the fire! or you can camp out in your yard. do you have a yard? light some candles, make some candle-s'mores. flannel blankets.
once my boyfriend and i slept outside in the bed of his truck. it was lovely. *sigh*
best of luck to your boyfriend and his goat! (damnit! gout!)
We have been laughing, too. Well, mostly me. He will occasionally get silly and say something like, "I have a bout of gout." Hardy har-har.
I have a hard time putting punctuation after the endquote - only because it looks lonely + homeless. The secret is out: I am so superficial!
We can't wait for the cool weather. It probably would have been too warm this weekend, anyhow...we slept with the windows open last night...that helped some!
crystalised foot joints, crazy meds, Ring of Fire? wow... i haven't laughed this much since two nights ago, when my roommate came home plastered and telling really strange jokes at a mile a minute. thank you.
on a more serious note... that sounds no fun. i suggest a run to Piggly Wiggly for air freshners and Ben Gay. but what do i know, i'm just a 19-year-old who just woke up from a drug-induced sleep. the best kind, to be sure.
in fact, i think i may go back. the dreams were funny. cheers!
---MB
vjcuz- the original MTV host.
Glad to make you get the giggles, Meghan. Luckily, we're able to have the windows open - the temperature is just cool + refreshing enough!
I'm taking big gulps of air...as you can imagine.
(zaymoga - i don't know, but i like it. i like it a lot).
hang in there. :)
so, according to kimberlina, i've been using proper puctuation all along. good- i'd wondered.
as for the ring of fire....i hate to laugh at the poor guy and his flaming asshole, but.....
*collapses in a fit of giggles*
aww, man! Ring of Fire. Go get him some baby ointment from the store; he will thank you. It sounds like I'm kidding but I'm not.
Gout and the craps. I think I'm going to call my band that.
Ring of Fire?! That is hysterical! The poor man. Oh my. I hope he feels better very soon.
A&D ointment might help douse the flames--it works for babies, should be good for grownups, too.
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