I'm at an age where I should have used super glue before, but for some reason, tonight was the first time I've ever used it. I had to make a hat for a co-worker's birthday (granted, this hat is extremely dorky/tacky, but that's the point: the birthday girl belongs to the "Gucci Only, Nothing Else Allowed, Ever" club, so I had to make it as least Gucci as possible). Yup, that's the straw I drew.
Anyway, everything on this hat is super glued, so there's no chance it will roll off. All of the gluing went smoothly, until I came to the little party favors (that you can hardly see, f*ing party favors). My fingers slipped when I tried to put the first one on, and the next thing I know, my left hand is akin to a circus freak's crippled webfoot. What a sensation!! I think burning, pulling, ripping and solidifying just about does it. OUUUUUCCCCHHIIEEEE! When I finally separated my digits, I had super glue stained to every single finger tip. That's when I started whimpering. I searched the packaging for a super glue antedote, assuming I'd be advised to call a doctor in case of emergency. Nope. "Just apply nail polish remover." If you have it. I don't. "If you don't have nail polish remover, idiot, then it should come off in a few days." That's when I started whimpering harder.
I understand super glue was invented for wounded soldiers in Vietnam (synthetic, super fucking stitches) - and now I know why so many vets have gone mad. YEEEEEEOUUUUUCHHHH.
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