(I Don't) Care Package. (I'd Rather You Keep Your Money.)

I have posted two consecutively freaky pictures: first the Catman and then...Andy M. I get scared when I look at my blog!

Secondly, a few posts down there, I described The Worst Best Friend I Have. Today, that friend sent me a package, congratulating me on starting back to work for the new school year. Like I said, these work-related kudos have become very typical, much to my dismay.

The contents of a horribly-so-off-target-I'm-cringing package:

(1) Miniature personalized chalkboard w/wooden school trinkets glued onto it.
(1) Notepad shaped like an apple. Oh right, and there's a bookworm coming out of the apple.
(1) Disney Magic Pen Painting Book.
(6) Six, count 'em, SIX pads of miniature crossword puzzles and word searches (I don't do either).


P.S. I don't even teach.
P.P.S. Nevermind I'm 25, very soon to be 26.

Anybody out there want this stuff? Will ship FOR FREE.